In part 1 of this series, we discussed three profitable places on which to help your teen focus his or her attention during times of disappointment and disillusionment with Christian leaders. Perhaps the leader who’s faltering is you as a parent or another family member. Regardless of the sin or struggle, the situation that threatens to “rock your son or daughter’s world” can be a faith-building experience instead. God can use anything for His glory, and this potentially devastating situation is no exception to that rule.
Expect Failure and Disappointment
When we realize that even those upheld as positive examples in Scripture were quite imperfect, we should not be surprised. We’re all sinners, made from dirt, needing Christ’s blood to wash away our sins. Once we repent and acknowledge our need for salvation, we still sin. And we will continue to do so until the day we die.
One of the results of that sin is that we all disappoint others. We all suffer as a result of not only Adam’s sin (also called “Original Sin” by theologians) and our own sin, but other humans’ sin, as well. That is our lot in life, as humans, and if we know our Bibles, it should come as no surprise (Romans 3:23).
Value Repentance over Perfection
Instead of expecting perfection, God allows us to be close to Him when we repent and humble ourselves before Him (Psalm 34:18). In fact, that’s precisely what separates a man like David from other sinners — many of whom stopped short of committing the “big sins” that he did (Psalm 51).
It’s not our lack of sin, but our response to our own sin, that determines our usefulness to the Lord. When others sin against us or disappoint us by their sin, we do well to adopt God’s values and forgive easily, offering the kind of grace that God lovingly offers us.
Resolve To Become a Worthy Leader
Instead of getting frustrated with others, whom we cannot control, we can commit to honoring God with our own lives. Of course, we will all make mistakes, so part of that commitment is to own up to our sins regularly.
The song “Where Is a Gideon” by Mac Lynch embraces the journey which God desires for disappointed teens to make as they channel their frustration into resolve to live for God:
This is a day when idols are worshiped; Even God’s people are trapped in their snares. Good men have fallen; Standards have shaken. Where is the answer? Who even cares?
Where is the man who gives up ambitions? Worldy desires are all set aside. Where is a man, though lonely be service, satisfied only in Him to abide?
Where is a Gideon? Where is a man? Who’ll be a leader and follow God’s plan? Where is God’s champion? Who’ll be the one to stand like Gideon? I’ll be that man.
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Appealing to Visual Learners
Once you’ve determined your teen’s learning style and have begun to accommodate it, you’ll probably start to notice some more effective learning and communicating going on. Now is the time to mention your findings to your teen. You might start by asking if they’ve noticed your efforts, and if they thought your recent efforts made a difference.
When did it happen for you? You probably remember that moment when you found out your Sunday school teacher struggled with bitterness, your pastor had to resign due to infidelity, or a deacon in your church had committed fraud at his workplace. These people had been your heroes of the faith — right up there with David and Paul and Jesus. All you had believed to be true about God and Christianity now hung in the balance. And if these incredible servants of God couldn’t be faithful to His Word, how could you possibly hope to meet His expectations? You felt like the solid ground on which you’d stood had turned to mud, and you were sinking. Fast.
Perhaps a study of God’s names or character would be especially helpful at this time. 
While we may argue that we don’t expect our flesh-and-blood examples of Christianity to be perfect, we often compare them to the heroes of the Bible. As we do so, we often look at the individuals recorded in God’s Word with our rose-colored glasses on. David was a man after God’s own heart, and yet he committed adultery, deceived many, and essentially committed murder to cover up his sin. The apostle Paul did much to harm the cause of Christ before he contributed positively to it.
Merriam-Webster defines self-esteem as: “a sense of personal worth and ability that is fundamental to an individual’s identity.”
Understand their needs. Your teenager has different goals for their life than you do. Even if you disagree with their needs, continue to understand. Teach your teen about other possibilities as you work with them to achieve their wants.
Hopefully, I’ve at least convinced you (see 
Sure, we know there can be physical issues that can cause feelings of depression. As Bible-believers, we also know that our hearts are deceptive, and focusing on self and difficult circumstances can cause dark and hopeless thoughts and feelings. Anecdotally, we all realize that some people have a greater natural propensity toward melancholy moods. Where one contributing factor ends and another begins is something none of us can measure.
This is especially significant if your teen has already been labeled (or has self-identified) as being “depressed” or “suicidal.” Make sure your teen knows that there is always hope, always an alternative. People in severe depression often feel as if there is no other option, so it’s incredibly important to remind them in times of clear thinking that there is always another choice.