Sexual promiscuity in teens is an issue that many parents feel uncomfortable addressing, but it is important that parents not ignore this problem. Failure to address this issue could result in any number of terrible consequences, both emotional and physical, so sexual promiscuity should not be taken lightly. (For more information on the risks of sexual promiscuity, see this article.) It is also important for parents to overcome the double standard of judging male teens’ sexual promiscuity differently from female teens’, because teens of both genders face almost exactly the same risks.
Before deciding on the best course of action for addressing your teen’s sexual promiscuity, it is usually a good idea to investigate the causes of their behavior. Most importantly, understand the following fact:
Sexual promiscuity in teens could be indicative of a deeper and more serious problem.
Often times, a teen’s choice to engage in sexual activity with many partners could be the result of a deeper underlying issue. Like many forms of addiction, sexual promiscuity usually does not stem from a simple love of sexual activity. Rather, in many cases, the decision to take several partners and engage in risky sexual behavior stems from a deeply rooted emotional or mental disorder. Depressed teens, for example, often engage in risky behavior beyond what is considered normal for an average teenager, and sexual promiscuity is an easy outlet for their negative feelings.
Teens who suffer from anxiety issues or major self esteem problems are also at risk of becoming sexually promiscuous, as sexual activity with multiple partners is often viewed as a form of self-validation. It is also often cited as an effective self esteem booster. These “positive” effects are only temporary, however, and it is usually only a matter of time before that teen moves on to another partner.
Teens who are sexually promiscuous are also sometimes experiencing family issues. These teens sometimes choose to use sexual activity as a means of “acting out,” so this is another possibility that parents should not ignore. By the same token, teens who were once the victim of sexual assault, such as rape or molestation, have also been known to use sexual promiscuity as a means of numbing themselves from the pain of their traumatic memories. Therefore, if your sexually promiscuous teen raises the possibility that this could have been a motivating factor behind their behavior, do not write this off as a desperate excuse. Although it is uncommon, it could be a possibility.
Sexual promiscuity in teens is a dangerous and even potentially deadly habit that should be addressed by parents as soon as possible. The subject might be uncomfortable, but the dangers of allowing the habit to continue in your child are much worse than the feelings of discomfort you may experience while discussing the topic. In many cases, seeking professional help is a wise decision, as it gives both teens and parents a safe environment in which to discuss their feelings and seek mutually satisfactory solutions.
I think it could often be a symptom of child sexual assault
That is one cause, and true for many people. But it’s not true for all. There are a number of things- and variety of thing together- that play a role.
My wife of 20 yrs is a good woman great mom and amazing wife. Loyal, true, but I know she carries shame and secrets. She has discovered the root of her young teenage sexual activity with random men. She was molested for years by a neighbor, but somehow had blocked it out, and reacted by disregarding her self worth and values. I feel like I’ve helped all I could, and am willing to do anything for her. She still bottles her emotions and has a very poor outlook on life especially men. Her famous line is men are disgusting pigs. Of course not I. Or am I? She refuses to talk to anyone else about this. Any advice? Do I have anything to worry about down the road? Menopause or age anything that might trigger her to wander? Or am I being judgemental?
Hello Dionne,
continue to be supportive and encourage her without being pushy to see a therapist. Therapy would be beneficial and therapeutic for your wife. Expressing those bottled up emotions she is feeling will set her soul free. Obviously she does not view all men as pigs because she married you, please continue to be patient with and love her.
Absolutely no tips given here.