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Discussing Sex-Change Surgery and Gay Marriage with Your Teen, Part 2

Last updated on October 4, 2015 by TT Staff Leave a Comment

Hopefully Part 1 at least got you thinking about how you’re discussing (or failing to actually engage with others about) the current issues relating to gender equality. Your teen will pick up on your attitudes and your perspectives, for better or for worse. As you intentionally interact with your teen about these issues, here are a few key points to consider.

What’s the Goal?

Contrary to how many Christians are debating this issue, marriage isn’t the end goal. While affirming biblical marriage as between one man and one woman, former lesbian Rosaria Butterfield takes issue with the elevation of even heterosexual marriage: “Even though some in our culture believe as Justice Kennedy wrote that marriage ‘embodies the highest ideals of love,’ we disagree. Earthly marriage does not have a monopoly on love. God is love (1 John 4:7-19). . . . In actuality, marriage is a mystery and a reflection of a greater reality. Truly, the highest ideal of love is Christ’s love for his bride, the church. . . . As important as earthly marriage and family are, they are both fleetingly temporary, while Christ and the family of God (the church) are wondrously eternal.”

How Can I Feel Fulfilled?

Ultimately, that’s what we’re all after. Some think they’ll find it through gender change or sexual interactions. Even seeking God because we want to feel a certain way can be a problem; our emotions are unreliable at best and following them can be devastating.

As Holly Stratton explains, “The message of the gospel is not about finding love, joy and peace in the midst of comfortable lives filled with fun families, obedient children, happy marriages, safe leaders or solid governments that serve as reflections of our godly wisdom and moral living. The message of the gospel is that we are wholly broken and that in Christ alone we find genuine love. That in Christ alone we find pure righteousness that is free from sin. That in Christ alone we find real joy and true peace. The message of the gospel is that it’s only by His grace that we aren’t living out the deepest corruption of our hearts.”

What’s Really the Problem?

Many homosexuals, and especially those self-identifying as transgendered and seeking sex-reassignment surgery have deep, underlying problems they are hoping to resolve. In fact, Johns Hopkins discontinued performing sex-reassignment surgeries because they saw how futile they were. As one former doctor from Hopkins writes, “These disorders occur in subjects who have come to believe that some of their psycho-social conflicts or problems will be resolved if they can change the way that they appear to others. Such ideas work like ruling passions in their subjects’ minds.”

Instead of focusing on the presentation, we need to begin by communicating God’s truth to those whose hearts are hurting. God’s grace and acceptance found in Christ can heal even the most conflicted hearts and minds.

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