Whether or not you have a spiritual support system you can respect and trust, you probably have at least a few people in your life that would ask you what they can do, in a time of crisis. If you’re like most people, you probably say, “I just don’t know.” But let’s think a little bit beyond the surface and plan ahead. Evaluate your tendencies and have some answers at-the-ready for when that question comes.
Strategic Phone Calls and Companionship
Some of us tend to have trouble sleeping or oversleep when we’re struggling. Some of us work ourselves like crazy or just veg out and ignore responsibilities as a form of escape. We need to be interrupted. Maybe we need a wake-up call. We don’t have to say that’s what it is, but we can ask someone to call us at 9 a.m. each morning during a difficult week. Or we can ask a friend to come over and watch a movie or even just go for a walk during the evening to help us take our minds off our troubles. Maybe text us a link to a soothing, happy song at bed time.
Specific Meals or Grocery Items
Are you a stress eater? Is it hard for you to focus on simple tasks like making a grocery list or pull yourself together enough to buy healthy foods or make decent meals? I know I do. And stress-eating is rarely healthy. Instead, our go-to becomes more highly processed, fatty foods that really drag us down.
Maybe fixing a meal would be helpful for us to do, and we’d be more likely to make the effort if we have a friend by our side. Maybe we just need someone to get the ingredients for us, so we can focus our energies on spiritual things and then enjoy making a healthy meal.
For me, my least favorite part of cooking is cleaning up, and I also tend to be more clumsy than usual when I’m struggling. So if someone brings me a meal in a disposable dish I don’t have to wash, that’s much more helpful to me than seeing their beautiful casserole dish and worrying about whether I’ll accidentally break it!
Support During Difficult Steps
Maybe you’re really dreading a particular aspect of your difficulty. It could be a doctor appointment, a meeting with the funeral director, or a conversation with an estranged sibling. Will you want a card to open before or after that event, or a friend to be by your side or ready to chat afterward? Ask. For. It. If you don’t ask, they won’t really know how to minister to you during that time. Maybe they would rather have alone time surrounding such a situation, so their default would be to give you your space. Everyone is different.
Along with communicating with those who are part of your Physical Support System, you’ll of course want to ask them what you can do when they’re in a difficult spot.
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